No, I’m just kidding, Coco. You bring a fun and interesting look to the game of baseball. Fans love it. Your teammate Josh Reddick decided to shave his ridiculously amazing and grizzly beard. That was a bad career move. You’re making a great career move by having hair similar to that of a crazy 70’s disco dancer.
You should go digging in the trash and find Reddick’s beard and then wear that. You’d be an instant Hall of Famer.