Over the weekend, the New York Times introduced America to the Advanced Aerospace Threat Identification Program -- a Defense Department initiative dedicated to investigating UFO sightings. The program, which ran from 2007 to 2012, uncovered a lot of compelling evidence to suggest that aliens had visited Earth in the past.
But really, if the Pentagon wanted to study the existence of life beyond earth, it should have just checked in with baseball fans. After all, we've become experts in the sorts of events that can only be explained by extraterrestrial contact. Things like:
That postseason UFO
What exactly flew over AT&T Park during the 2014 NLDS between the Giants and Nationals? A blimp ... or something more sinister?
We can't know for sure, but we will say this: We've seen enough alien movies to know the silhouette of a UFO when we see one:
Baseballs with a mind of their own
Physics was never our strength, but even we know that ground balls don't do things like this on their own:
That isn't the only way aliens have helped unsuspecting batters. Behold this Chase Headley bunt:
Baseballs that never came down
Back in May, Indians catcher Yan Gomes hit a fly ball to left field in Houston. The ball remains at large. It might just be the result of a quirk in the roof at Minute Maid Park, or it might have been abducted by a spaceship -- who can say. A.J. Hinch, for one, will never stop searching for answers:
Outfielders that never came down
Look at this diving Kevin Pillar catch.
Right at the moment when any ordinary body might fall victim to gravity and start heading back toward Earth, Pillar just ... keeps going. Aliens in the Outfield, anyone?
All this time, you've assumed that Posey was simply an incredible baseball player. But think about it: He's made five All-Star teams in nine seasons, won three World Series and been named both NL Rookie of the Year Award and NL MVP. The man can seemingly do no wrong ... almost as if he's secretly a baseball alien, sent to our planet to educate us all.
Still skeptical? Consider that even Posey's mistakes end up working out -- like when he threw the ball back to pitcher Jake Peavy while Peavy wasn't looking, only for the ball to end up in Peavy's glove anyway:
We're not saying, we're just saying.
Travis Wood's force field
The Cubs' bullpen has developed a tradition in recent years: No matter what, they never get out of the way of a foul ball that's headed in their direction. Sure, it sounds crazy, but when you factor in the force field that protects Travis Wood at all times, it makes perfect sense:
... OK, seriously, where did that ball go?